We are frustrated tabloid hacks with a common interest in red-hot monkey love and we wish to bring to you the stories that our editors dare not print. Read our profile page to find out more.
Celebrity Bestiality was published monthly from 1999 until 2003. Then, after a suggestion made at a somewhat regrettable social gathering, we went away to have a good, long, hard look at ourselves. Now we're back.
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CELEBRITY DOLPHIN SPECIAL
Issue 21 - April 2001
We have been advised by our lawyers to inform you that this is not a picture of Tom Selleck shagging dolphins.
It is, of course, a picture of Nigel Mansell.
Now we all know that Nigel is a man who likes to live on the edge - but perhaps someone should warn him that while dolphins often (cough) swim both ways, they present a significant health risk to any male human attempting to accommodate one internally.
This is why celebrities who go swimming with them wear those protective wetsuits. They want a touching photo opportunity, not a penetrating one - which is a shame.
Everybody needs a little porpoise in their life.
